Holding high my chains undone...

Today, my friends, I had a bit of a breakthrough.

This morning I (somewhat reluctantly) got up and went for a walk/jog. I have officially begun week 4 of Couch to 5K training. "What is so significant about that?" you may ask. Well, this is the first week where you are actually jogging more than you are walking.

Yes, you read right: jogging MORE than walking.

Today the goal was to walk for only 2 minutes and then jog for 3 minutes. And as much of a challenge as it sounded like this morning when I was laying in bed, it really wasn't all that bad.

The thing is, you repeat this repetition 5 times.

But, I persevered and made it through (not in my own strength, mind you).

See, today I was very much aware of some outside help spurring me on and encouraging me to push through the muscle fatigue that was becoming harder and harder to resist as I passed the halfway point in my workout.

What outside help?

Well, God, of course.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. ~ Phil 4:13

Like a friend of mine on blogspot, I found myself quoting this like a mantra when I was getting my stuff gathered together to head out the door.

To give you a glimpse into my mindset as I was entering my workout: I was already late getting out of bed and on my way out the door. I was worried about the fact that I couldn't find my package of travel kleenix that I normally carry with me. I was already wanting to lose the water bottle I carried in my hands because it was making my hands colder than they were to begin with (and yes, I was wearing gloves). I was tired. I was ready to go back home, curl up in a ball, and bag the whole thing. But, I went anyway.

And as I was jogging, this song came on. Initially I registered the song with simply an "Oh, I like this song!" But then I wondered about the pace of the song (it is a little slower) and was debating briefly about skipping it. As I started debating about it, the chorus came on:

To the cross I run, holding high my chains undone
And now I'm finally free,
free to be what I've become

And as I heard those words, I felt my heart and spirit lift. My steps grew lighter (which takes some doing when I'm jogging), and I began claiming those words as my own. The second verse caught my attention:

Even in defeat, the face of tragedy
Still you have to say that I found victory
In brokenness comes beauty, divine fragility
Reminding me of nail-scarred hands reaching out for me

I had woken up this morning feeling slightly defeated (and trust me, that's not the best way to begin your morning) and yet the fact that I actually walked out of my door (despite the late start) was victory in and of itself.

And I knew at that moment that it wasn't a victory that I won on my own. I knew it was God encouraging me, nudging me towards my workout clothes, tennis shoes, and other gear and pushing me out the door. I felt a freedom in jogging that I have NEVER felt before. And the really cool thing? I began to worship as I was jogging.

I can honestly say that I don't think I have ever worshipped while I was jogging before. And yeah, as time went on in my workout I felt myself dragging more and more. But, the brief worship session I had with God has carried me through to this point and time as I type these words.

It is because of Christ I am free from the chains that have bound me and caused me to get to where I am today. I am free from the binges, free from my compulsion to eat when I'm bored.

But I'm not just free FROM something. I am free TO something.

I am free to be what I've become. I am free to enjoy food in a healthy way. I am free to experience, express, and deal with my emotions in a healthy manner. But overall, I am free to experience life more fully.

And ultimately, that is what this journey is about. Losing weight and getting fit is just an added bonus.

*****
For the song (Undone by MercyMe), click below